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| Motivation Information |
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Do You Know Which Door To Open?
Do you remember that old television program that gave the contestant the opportunity to choose one of three doors and receive whatever was behind the door? I was reminded of this television program the other day when I was pondering a decision I was struggling to make. My usual process for decision-making is to make a list of pros and cons, revisiting and revising the list every couple of days. When I feel that everything is listed in the right column, I weigh the pros and cons and make my decision. During this last exercise I had pros and cons on the paper but internally I was reading the headings as success and failure. Now, you know I know better! It did not matter what I knew when making the list, I still kept reading success and failure. So, in frustration I put the list away and decided to let things sit for a few days and go back to it. This was really good advice, if I do say so myself. It was in this waiting period that I thought of that old television program and the three doors. Now, it wouldn't be prudent to just choose a door and go with whatever was behind it, but the thought of the three doors made me realize I had three options. If I chose Door #1, I would choose option #1. Choosing Door #2 would mean I opted for the second option and if I chose Door #3 I would be choosing not to choose. When it comes to decision-making we sometimes forget that not choosing is making a choice. We lose sight of the fact that not choosing can be healthy and rewarding. Now, of course, I don't mean you can just go through life letting life happen all the time, with no decision-making effort on your part. But, sometimes, that is just what you should do. When the decision-making is really tough, when you are thinking about it all the time and feel like you are getting nowhere, why not choose Door #3? The next time I made my list I listed headings of Door #1, Door #2 and Door #3. Under Door #1 I listed all of the really good things about that option and then I did the same thing for Door #2. I did not list any cons! I simply created a vision of the best of both options. Under Door #3 I wrote "serendipity" (the gift of discovering things accidentally). By not forcing myself to choose I opened Door # 3 and allowed myself the freedom of discovery. By not labeling pros and cons the success/failure identifiers went away. I now am able to discover whether Door #1 or Door #2 holds the prize I want to attain by envisioning, and living in the vision, of the best of both options. Interesting Word History: English author Horace Walpole coined the word serendipity. In a letter of January 28, 1754, Walpole says that "this discovery, indeed, is almost of that kind which I call Serendipity, a very expressive word." Walpole formed the word on an old name for Sri Lanka, Serendip. He explained that this name was part of the title of "a silly fairy tale, called The Three Princes of Serendip: as their highnesses traveled, they were always making discoveries, by accidents and sagacity, of things which they were not in quest of...." Beth Densmore is a Personal Life Coach and Motivational Speaker who offers support, inspiration and motivation to those who are in transition and want to achieve a goal. For more information and more free articles like this, visit her site at http://www.newfocuscoaching.com.
Motivation - Google News |
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Business Management How to Become an Effective Self-Help User "Know Yourself" That's what the big guy said way back when? Was it Aristotle, Plato or Socrates? Anyhow, that's the essence of what this article is about. 9 Great Ways To Change Your Life By Changing Your Motivation Style If you are not as productive as you would like or tend to procrastinate, you can become motivated by changing your personal style. The trick lies in making the activities you put off more interesting, easier, and less unpleasant. How to Use the Power of Words to Your Benefit - Part II A friend of mine read the article, How to Use the Power of Words to Your Benefit, and dryly made the comment, "So what?" How To Deal With Denial Denial is a coping mechanism commonly used when something happens that we really don't want to see. Doing this is actually quite natural. After all, we want to keep our lives in order, and we resist taking in information that we feel would result in a loss for us. Stop Procrastination - Just do it! What stops you from 'getting things done?' 5 Ways to Fight Pessimism Some people are naturally pessimistic and are happy being so. They view themselves as pragmatic and as having a better sense of reality. Then there are those of us who feel weighed down by negativity and wish that we could be more optimistic. This is completely possible. It all lies in the way we perceive things... 1. Stress management When we conceal our anxieties, they only build. Each concern can snowball into a feeling of being overwhelmed. Each person has their own way of letting off steam. This varies from exercise, to listening to music, to reading a good book. More of us are beginning to realize how important proper stress management is to both our physical and mental health. 2. Constant reality checks It is sometimes necessary to debate the validity of your concerns to determine whether they are rational or not. This is called self-rationalization and one of the most recognized methods is the worst case scenario. This is when you consider the worst possible situation, then go on to consider whether it is likely to happen. For example, a loved one said they would call once they arrived by subway to a certain destination. They should have reached that destination 15 minutes ago. You may dream up scenarios of there being a train accident or some other frightful incident took place. But after a little thought, you find that it's more probable that they either have yet to reach their stop or they will simply call you when it is convenient for them. You never want to leap to conclusions and cause yourself unnecessary stress. 3. Support of friends and family Friends and family are usually more than willing to provide you with a much needed reality check. Not everyone is fortunate enough to have close friends and family members to confide in though. It is detrimental to find some type of support when you are feeling extremely confused or overwhelmed. This support may have to come from a trusted co-worker or a member of a support group. Sometimes all it takes is another person's point of view to put things into perspective. 4. Own your feelings Accept that you have complete control over your perceptions and internal responses. You may not have control over what happened on your commute to work that upset you. But you are able to decide whether you become relieved when the day is finally over, or frustrated, claiming you are always being dealt a bad hand. Employee Motivation Checklist - Ten Measures of Success In the form of a simple easy to use checklist, you can score how well you are doing out of 10. Better still, ask them. It's like what they describe as a mini-360o, where your people get the chance to give you feedback. Only here it is a lot easier and far far cheaper! But then it's how you handle the results of feedback that counts the most. Persistence Persistence will carve you as a leader in your industry. Persistence is where you get mental strength. It seperates you from ordinary people. You must learn to cultivate a habit of persisting, since all things are possible if you persist. Nothing To Lose I stormed out of the office and headed for the patio area in front of my office building. It was October 2003, and everybody knew what happened. Ever since our division consolidated in February 2002, there had been more "closed door" conversations than ever, and when they involved me, I usually came out angry. This time I was madder than ever. I was sick of the office politics, sick of the cliques, sick of people sneaking around the rules and you can only take all of that being sick so long before you explode. After complaining to my supervisor for the umpteenth time about the state of affairs, we both cracked. I told her I was disappointed at the lack of morals and integrity, and she told me that I needed to just shut up and get professional help for depression if that's what it took to quit complaining. Here is the ironic part: I have a degree in psychology. The Undeniable Power of a Mastermind Group A Mastermind is a group of individuals who are joined in purpose. All bringing their collective talents and experiences to the achievement of a common goal. Success: Its Really Pretty Simple From the 'What You Need to Succeed' Series The Simple Life When we talk about a Simple Life, we are not talking about Paris and Nicole. We are talking about a life that is in harmony with our values. We are talking about a life that is joyful to live. Courage Is A Gift "It is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters. -Epictetus, the 1st Century Greek Philosopher What Motivates You? As a life-long student of personal development, I've attended dozens of motivational seminars, listened to hundreds of tapes, and read untold books on the subject of motivation . I've presented motivational seminars. And yet there is one elemental truth that seems often overlooked. That is: no one can motivate you, because you have to do it to yourself. It's an inside job. And frankly it's less a function of "doing" than it is of discovering what your natural motivators are. So the key to getting and staying motivated is finding out what excites you. What makes you want to jump out of bed in the morning? What speaks to your heart as well as your head? Action vs. Self Delusion Knowledge fueled by emotion equals action. Action is the ingredient that ensures results. Only action can cause reaction. Further, only positive action can cause positive reaction. Whats Your Zipline? A few years ago, I was with 20 of America's most effective presenters The Speakers Roundtable at the Pecos River Conference Center near Sante Fe, NM. We were working on our communication skills, not unlike the work we do in our own Excellence in Speaking Institute (ESI) classes. Why are You Living? It was 4,O'Clock in the morning, my regular time to leave my bed and prepare myself for the day's activities. But today, it was special?some thoughts were troubling the peace of my find. Why are we living? What is the purpose of this life? For whom, I am living? For my parents, my spouse, my kids, my country, my religion, NO, I am and in that manner we all are living for ourselves. If today anything happens to me, will my spouse, my parents, my kids, stop living? No, they will not. Then, what is the purpose of living? Why are you living? You are living for yourself, your name, your growth, and your happiness. The purpose of this life is: "You in Particular and others in General". Top 5 Reasons Why Youre Not Living Your Dream 1. "I'm too old to make a change." Maybe you are over 30 and settled in your career. You don't even want to think about making a move somewhere else. Besides, at this point in your life, you are supposed to be doing what you want, right? Wake Up to the Life You Love While speaking at a San Diego university recently, I was fortunate that I was not asked to leave the stage. You see, I chose to share with the students in my audience some frightening statistics. I announced that, while many would receive their degrees, few very few would end up pursuing careers in their chosen field. At this point, the faculty began giving me dirty looks. Get The Man Right One Saturday morning, a minister could not think of a sermon to write. He simply could not get inspired. He stared out of the window, at the birds splashing in the bird-bath. His mind was blank, as was the sheet of paper on his writing desk.
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