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How to Effectively Balance Your Work and Family Life
What Is Your Definition of Success? If you want to create balance in your life, it is important to know how you define success. The following list is a place to start. Cross off those that don't seem important to you and add your own. Next, identify which of the items on your list are the most essential to your success definition and which items present the greatest challenge to you. 1. Being able to move on when a situation is no longer productive or positive 2. Being satisfied with your work situation 3. Enjoying the present, not putting off the good things until some time in the future 4. Expressing your creativity 5. Fulfilling your potential 6. Holding yourself with esteem separately from your work 7. Being authentic 8. Identifying your values and basing your choices on them 9. Managing your money well 10. Not feeling envious of others 11. Paying attention to your spiritual life 12. Spending time in fun ways away from your workplace 13. Spending time with people you cherish and enjoy 14. Taking good care of yourself 15. Understanding when to fight for something and when to give in What would you add? Which items present the greatest challenge to you? The 80/20 Rule The 80/20 Rule, also known as the Pareto Principle, says that 20% of what we do produces 80% of the results. Some examples of this principle are: ? 20% of the people sell 80% of the widgets. ? 20% of the salespeople earn 80% of the commission. ? 20% of the parts in your car cause 80% of the breakdowns. ? 20% of the members of an organization do 80% of the work. The 80/20 principle can help anyone create balance in their life. Here's how: 1. Identify the times when you are most happy and productive (i.e., the 20% that produces the 80%) and increase them as much as possible. 2. Identify the times when you are least happy and productive (i.e., the 80% that produces the 20%), and reduce them as much as possible. Your Seven Habits of Success You have probably heard of Stephen Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. As you create balance in your life, think about your own list of success habits. What seven things would lead to more happiness in your life if you did them every day? Here are some ideas to get you started: 1. Do something you love doing for at least part of the day. 2. Get some physical exercise. 3. Get some mental exercise. 4. Stimulate yourself artistically. 5. Stimulate yourself spiritually. 6. Do something for someone else. 7. Do something just for fun. 8. Acknowledge yourself for something you said or did. What ideas would you add? Dealing with Workaholism What if a person needs more than just self-help in dealing with a lack of balance in work and family life? An organization called Workaholics Anonymous can help. Workaholics Anonymous is a 12-step recovery program similar to Alcoholics Anonymous. It is a "fellowship of individuals who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others recover from workaholism. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop working compulsively." How Do You Know if You Are a Workaholic? Ask yourself these questions if you think you might be a workaholic: 1. Are you more comfortable talking about work than anything else? 2. Do you become impatient with people who do things besides work? 3. Do you believe that more money will solve the other problems in your life? 4. Do you get irritated when people ask you to stop working and do something else? 5. Do you get more energized about your work than about anything else, including your personal relationships? 6. Do you look for ways to turn your hobbies into money-making endeavors? 7. Do you often worry about the future, even when work is going well? 8. Do you take on extra work because you are concerned that it won't otherwise get done? 9. Do you take work home with you? Do you work on days off? Do you work while you are on vacation? 10. Do you think about your work while driving, falling asleep, or when others are talking? 11. Do you think that if you don't work hard you will lose your job or be considered a failure? 12. Do you work more than 40 hours in a typical week? 13. Do you work or read while you are eating? 14. Have your long hours hurt your family or other relationships? Garrett Coan is a professional therapist,coach and psychotherapist. His two Northern New Jersey office locations are accessible to individuals who reside in Bergen County, Essex County, Passaic County, Rockland County, and Manhattan. He offers online and telephone counseling services for those who live at a distance. He can be accessed through http://www.creativecounselors.com or 201-303-4303.
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Business Management Solution-Focused Therapy Most types of psychotherapy involve exploring feelings, being validated, finding explanations, exploring wishes and dreams, setting goals, and gaining clarity. Every therapist has unique ways of working with clients, based on his or her personality, training, and views of how people change. A solution-focused therapist is likely to do the following: Control, Helplessness, and Love During my 35 years of counseling individuals, couples, families and business partners, I have discovered that an important purpose of our controlling behavior in our relationships is to avoid the feeling of helplessness. One of the hardest feelings to feel is helplessness. Most of us are unwilling to even know what we are and are not helpless over. Our controlling behavior toward others generally comes from our unwillingness to accept our helplessness over others' feelings and behavior. We do not want to know that we are helpless over whether another chooses to be loving and accepting toward us or judgmental and rejecting toward us. Change vs Transition "There is a time for departure, even when there's no certain place to go." -- Tennessee Williams Worth Waiting For Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 22, 2002 Whats Wrong with Life Coaching? As a Life Coach I quickly identified most individuals wanted to achieve a particular goal or ambition and tried it themselves without success, and unfortunatley were still reluctant to get any help. So, I started 'A Life Coaching' a company which provides individuals with the tools, skills and processes to Life Coach themselves. (Free sample multi media below.) Could You and Your Business Benefit from a Business Coach or a Consultant? The surprising answer is "probably". Most individuals don't realize that a certified business coach or business consultant can add enormously to their home based or more traditional type business. Many individuals think a business coach or consultant will come into their business and tell them things that they don't want to hear. Strategic Checklists I've been through a couple of checklists in the past few days, and it's reaffirmed my faith in their effectiveness as a communication tool. You Can Get There From Here But first you've got to raise your standards. Viewpoints - Communication Destruction Or.... Viewpoints! Everyone has them and they are personal. However, when you believe that only your view is correct, you shut out other people and do not listen to the facts they are giving. Emotional Dependency or Emotional Responsibility Emotional dependency means getting one's good feelings from outside oneself. It means needing to get filled from outside rather than from within. Who or what do you believe is responsible for your emotional wellbeing? Fear of Intimacy Emotional intimacy is one of the most wonderful experiences we ever have. Nothing else really comes close to the experience of sharing our deepest thoughts and feelings with another, of being deeply seen and known, of sharing love, passion, laughter, joy, and/or creativity. The experience of intimacy fills our souls and takes away our loneliness. Three Great Ways to Deal with Negative People 1. Do not believe everything you hear! Life Coach, Counsellor, or Therapist; - How do I choose? Life coaching has become fashionable in recent years and there seems to be a big demand for what they offer. Counselling and many forms of therapy are also on offer, these may have been around for many years and have advantages to offer clients. Yet how do you choose which one to go for? HR Professional in New Avtaar: HR as a Coach and Mentor Introduction The Top 10 BEST Things About Having a Coach Obviously, there are many wonderful things about having a personal coach to support and encourage you. Everyone develops their own working relationship with their coach, and each situation is unique. So, with lots of respect for all the many things you may find valuable about having a coach, here are the Top 10 things clients have said to me: Poise, Posture, and Performance Good posture is seen to have many advantages. From an aesthetic point of view it can enhance image, sending out the right signals (body language). For an athlete it is seen to be essential. But what is a good posture? We recognise poor posture when we see it, as it is evident in the majority of adults regardless of athletic ability. But just to confuse the matter, people with an ideal 'plumb-line' posture can also have poor movement patterns. This is because it is not the shape that is important but how it is maintained. An apparent 'good' posture can be achieved with totally inappropriate muscular activity. Choosing The Right Coach Coaching has become a very popular way for people to get the ongoing support they need to accomplish their goals. However, choosing a coach can be tricky. There are so many METHODS, models, and approaches. Coaches come from every background possible -- from counseling to consulting to corporate America. And each individual has a PERSONALITY, communication style, and temperament that is going to match well with some people and clash with others. So how do you choose someone who is right for you? Five Steps to Vocational Passion: A Disciplined Plan for Major Mid-life Changes There's a famous song lyric that asks: "Is that all there is?" Every seven seconds, an American turns 50 years old. So there's a good chance that song is running through some of their heads. How Stella (Laurie) Got Her Groove Back! Being a Life Strategy Coach doesn't mean I'm always on top of my game, completely balanced and without my own challenges. Building a website, writing an e-book, getting a newsletter off the ground and securing clients required a great deal of work and commitment. Kabbalah Coach: Love the One Youre With Introduction
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