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A Quick Checklist for Improving Your Life
1. Learn About You If you don't know who you are and why you think and act the way you do, it's gonna be really difficult to make any positive changes in your life. Take a look first at your parents and close family members. Think about how they look and how they deal with life. This is the basis for who you are today. You've been instilled with the tendency to think as they think and act as they act. It's just the way it is. Now think about the big events in your life so far. The ones that stand out in your mind. The ones that made an impression negative or positive on you. These events have likely influenced how you think and act today. Oh sure, we can add in every little thing that you've ever seen, heard, felt, smelled or touched because "everything" has had some effect on you - on how you think and deal with life. But it's the "biggies" that usually have the most impact. You can write some of this down if you want to. Make a list of things you like or don't like. Things you enjoy doing. Things that make you happy or sad. But you don't need to if you would rather not. Just thinking about this is a major step in the right direction. Just get to know you. It's important. 2. Learn About Others You already know now why you are you. Think about why other people think and act as they do. It should be fairly simple because they're who and what they are for the same reasons you are who you are. They've just had a different family and life experiences. Therefore, they'll all act at least somewhat differently and think differently than you. Why spend the time learning about others? Well because the more you learn about why other folks think and act as they do, the more you'll learn about yourself. And that's still important. 3. Practice Thinking Differently If you continue to think the same way as you do right now, nothing can change. Everything we do is based on how we think about ourselves, about others and about life. If you think life is pretty crappy, well sure enough, it will be pretty crappy. If you think life is generally OK, sure enough, it will be generally OK. If you think you are a loser, you are. If you think you have a lot to offer your friends, family and this world, you do. We think our way to our destiny. What's your destiny? 4. Pour a Solid Foundation You can't build much of anything without a strong foundation structure. Roads, buildings, bridges, cars, life all require a firm foundation to last and withstand the eroding elements of nature. If you haven't already, you might consider looking into using a spiritually-based concrete for your foundation. (No, I did not say religious but if that's your preference, use it.) Strong values and principles can provide reinforcement. If you'll continue to work to add strength to your under-footing as you go through life, you'll have all the support you'll ever need. 5. Build a New Life Use whatever references you think you need to start and continue your building process. There are plenty of organizations, schools and references of all types available to help you on your way. Find the experts and listen to their stories and advice. Identify a mentor, coach or a close friend who can give you lots of support and encouragement. And be sure to DO SOMETHING! ACT! All the information and knowledge is worthless unless you put it to work for you. Decide what you would like your destiny to be. Then just go for it! About The Author Gene, through NuPathz.com, provides an easy reading self-help blog, articles and links along with affordable books and materials written to help folks find the road to a more enjoyable lifestyle, to pass on some of life's "secrets for survival" in a chaotic world & offer a few smiles along the way. It's a down-to-earth, simple approach to discovering a better life. You can visit Gene at http://www.nupathz.com/
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Business Management Curse of Competence: How Being Good gets in the way of Becoming Great Just before the storms hit last winter, my father-in-law and I replaced 26 feet of fence on my property. I must say, for a couple of non-handyman-sorts like the two of us, it is a very well done fence. Is Coaching For You? More and more people have less and less time, but have greater demands both personally and professionally. This situation has resulted in the emergence of personal coaching within four basic areas: Financial, Physical or Fitness, Life or Career and Executive Performance. Seeing Your Energy At Work Our bodies are made of pure energy. With Quantum physics we learn that the cells of our body are made of molecules, which are made of atoms, which are made of sub-atomic particles. Curbing the Public Nuisance (Part 1) He's been around since the dawn of humanity. His profession is even older than the world's oldest profession. He's been loathed and reviled by politicians, bureaucrats and hot dog vendors. A Beginner To Beginners You may be just starting, or contemplating, your first online business. Or, just like me, you may be trying out yet another online business scheme. The Executive Coaching Contract Having found a coach you feel comfortable and excited about working with, the next step is to discuss and sign the coaching contract or agreement. This is vital to ensure that both coach and client are clear from the outset about what is expected. Self-Defense Within Martial Arts Training Demands a Real-World Perspective This story is being offered in response to a request made by my teacher, Soke (Grand Master) Masaaki Hatsumi, during a recent training visit to Japan. During one of the training sessions, Soke was suggesting that everyone, regardless of rank, should make it a point to talk to those with actual combat experience and to learn from these people. The point was, if you do not know what a real fight is like, you will not be able to train properly for an authentic situation. What The Buddha Says About Coaches There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: The Power of Visualization Professional athletes and other highly successful people use the power of visualization technique on a regular basis. Why? Results of a 20-year study of the effects of visualization on results revealed an amazing discovery. Humans see pictures on the screen of the mind when thoughts are being processed; i.e. when they think of things. Coaching: The Art of Putting Yourself In Somone Elses Shoes COACHING STEPS: The following are five (5) steps a coach can take to change behavior and performance. The goal of this process is to create the context for the person being coached towards one in which excellence becomes the norm. 1. Observe the action/behavior you want to change. 2. Describe the situation/action you saw. 3. Ask the employees what they saw, their perspective/point of view. 4. Tell the person how you saw the behavior, then 5. Describe what needs to happen instead and why - if appropriate. How To Overcome Stuck States In Personal Growth Although many of us use self-help tools like affirmations, visualizations, NLP techniques, and spiritual invocations, we sometimes find that nothing happens. This, to say the least, is disheartening. After many years as a psychotherapist, I found that the brain can be compared to a computer. Since the computer was founded to replicate some of the features of our brains, the analogy also works the other way. In a computer, a corrupted file, a virus, or any other type of malignant software is sufficient to slow the computer down, create frequent crashes, and cause difficulties in opening certain files. In a brain, a negative decision based on some troubling event is sufficient to create internal resistance. This resistance is unconscious and often defies the most valiant efforts by the conscious mind to defeat it. While working in therapy or holistic practice is an excellent way to overcome blockers, internal feedback loops that prevents forward progress, it isn't always convenient and affordable to find the right person when you need him or her. What do we do to move forward when we feel stuck? How do we debug the brain? And how do we do it on our own? In pondering this question, I came across this marvelous technique by Karol Truman in her amazing book, Feelings Buried Alive Never Die? She has created a script that speaks to your unconscious mind using a spiritual perspective. It's deliberately convoluted and confusing to the conscious mind so that the unconscious gets to work. Also, you don't feel anything after you are done, since it's below the radar of your usual awareness. I'll give it to you here to try out. And, incidentally, if you feel that it doesn't work, recognize that this too is resistance and work on releasing your doubt (which is basically a fear of failure.) Spirit, please locate the origin of my feeling/thought of feeling negative about (insert the feeling or belief you want to release here). Take each and every level, layer, area and aspect of my be-ing to this origin. Analyze and resolve it perfectly, with God's truth. Come forward in time, healing every incident based upon the foundation of the first, according to God's will; until I'm at the present, filled with light and truth, God's peace and love, forgiveness of myself for my incorrect perceptions, forgiveness of every person, place, circumstance and event which contributed to this feeling/thought. With total forgiveness and unconditional love I delete the old from my DNA, release it, and let it go now! I feel (insert the way you want to feel here). I allow every physical, mental, emotional and spiritual problem, and inappropriate behavior based on the old feelings to quickly disappear. Thank you, Spirit, for coming to my aid and helping me attain the full measure of my creation. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you and praise God from whom all blessings flow. Progress Reviews: Your Key To Effective Coaching One of the most effective ways to help your staff succeed is to provide regular, consistent coaching throughout the year. A Progress Review is a specific kind of coaching discussion, tied to the employee's Annual Objectives and Standards. It is an informal discussion in which the manager coaches the direct report to meet any unmet goals that are below target, and praises him or her for goals that are being met. Conducting progress reviews are a very important role for being an effective leader or coach. It is suggested that each of your direct reports receive a progress review discussion from you at least 2-3 times per year. Viewpoints - Communication Destruction Or.... Viewpoints! Everyone has them and they are personal. However, when you believe that only your view is correct, you shut out other people and do not listen to the facts they are giving. The Best Things in Life Are Rarely Things Have you ever noticed this to be true? A Coaching Secret I've told people for a long time that one of the "secrets" of coaching is forgiveness. Forgiveness takes your finger out of the dyke of the past so you can let the future flow. Buddha said, "forgiveness is giving up all hope of a better past." It is an act of total volition, requiring only a softening of the heart. But how do you forgive the unforgivable? Value Based Leadership Coaching What can I do to be a better coach? The Eight Step Coaching Model describes the process, yet too often the focus is on techniques only. "How can I say it to win my point, get others to do things my way, or convince them?" Focusing only on one technique is fundamentally manipulative. Good leadership coaching, like good parenting, is a way of being as well as doing. This way of being, or our values, drives our behaviors. Like Olympic figure skaters, coaches should evaluate themselves in two areas; skills and style, the expression of your values. Dealing Effectively with Midlife Issues In this article we would like to help you explore the challenges and opportunities that come at midlife. You will have an opportunity to take a look at issues that are specific to the Baby Boomer generation. You will also have a chance to begin the process of your own midlife assessment with a list of questions presented at the end of the newsletter. We call this assessment the Midlife Checkup. A Christmas Wish My sister is a woman now beginning her thirties. She has had few friends and her boyfriends have never been good for her. Now she has finally found a man who adores her. The Difference Between Approval and Appreciation Having worked with individuals, couples, families and business partners for 35 years, helping them learn to resolve conflict, I have often been faced with the difficulties that occur when people are confused about the difference between approval with appreciation. Have you ever wondered about the difference between approval and appreciation? Most of us have never actually thought about it, yet if we do think about it, we realize that we feel very differently when we receive approval as opposed to receiving appreciation. There are good reasons for this. New Developments Make Christian Life Coaching ?The? Career Choice for Work-At-Home Professionals I have watched for a couple years now, as my wife's career has really taken off and I must admit, I am impressed. At the age of 55, having had so many life experiences, it just made me sit up and take notice that something huge is happening. In addition to this, I have seen her income quadruple over the past year.
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