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Trust In The Moment, and Trust In Yourself
Do you often get yourself upset and feeling less than fully confident, as part of your preparation for facing a daunting challenge? You can improve your performance if you let your somatic intelligence lead the way."You move too much to be effective." Tamura sensei softly shouted at me. "You need to give your opponent a clearer target to strike at." We were in the middle of studying how to defend ourselves from multiple attackers in an Aikido class for senior students in Japan. Five young college students rushed at me once again, and once again I struggled to cope with them. "OK, take a break." Tamura sensei said. "In order for the five attackers to actually hit you they have to first reach you. Your job is NOT to run away from them. You need to create a spacing that leads them to all try and grab or hit you at the same time. Think of the attackers as needing to pass through a gate. If they all try and rush through the gate at the same time they will block each others efforts. Move less, do less, and be calm. Give them a clear target that they all reach at the same time." I had heard similar remarks in the past, but accomplishing this in the heat of the moment requires a moving calmness that takes a while to get the hang of. You know in your head what you are supposed to do, but once your heart starts beating faster and your opponents are bearing down on you, you find it really hard to believe in what you are being told. "Think of it this way." sensei said. He pulled out a cloth that he used to wipe away his sweat and said, "Here, take this away from me." As I grabbed for the cloth, he more or less handed it to me. Just as I was beginning to get a good hold on it he let go of the cloth and grabbed onto my wrist and placed me in a painful hold. I immediately let go of the cloth, and he picked it back up with one hand as he continued to keep me subdued with his other hand. "You see." he said, "I am not defending the cloth, I am defending myself. Better to give you the cloth, and then I have both hands free to do as I need." "When you move less you offer your opponents a clear target. When you offer them a clear target you will be able to understand how they are wanting to attack. They will attack you in the same manner you reached for my cloth. Confident they will accomplish their mission, because you have made it easy for them. At the last moment, just as they begin to strike or grab, take the target away from them. They will be surprised, and you will have the opportunity to do whatever is necessary." He got up and invited the five students to attack him. He moved very little, and it was as if he was making each one of them thread themselves through the eye of a needle. Just ever so much of a movement made by him, made them just miss their target. "This is what happens often in our every day life." he said. "You feel like you are faced with a daunting task, and you make your task harder by moving about needlessly and losing your composure. Breathe deeply, be calm, and know the right moment will present itself to you if you have the faith to wait. Don't force the issue, and don't force the timing. Trust in the moment, and trust in yourself. Take the initiative by doing nothing." You ARE capable. Give yourself the opportunity to excel by trusting in the moment and trusting in yourself. Wait calmly, and you will find that the necessary answers appear before you. Little by little... with lots of practice... and endless patience. Only move when the moment is right. Breathe deeply and begin at the beginning. About The Author Charlie Badenhop is the originator of Seishindo, an Aikido instructor, NLP trainer, and Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. Benefit from his thought-provoking ideas and a new self-help Practice every two weeks, by subscribing to his complimentary newsletter "Pure Heart, Simple Mind" at http://www.seishindo.org/anger/index.html.
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Upon being shown his grave by the ghost of Christmas Future, he asks "Spirit, are these instances of things that will be or are they of things that might be? Is it too late for me?" How long has it been since you have examined your life and its direction? When the day comes that you leave this earth, how will you be remembered? Progress Reviews: Your Key To Effective Coaching One of the most effective ways to help your staff succeed is to provide regular, consistent coaching throughout the year. A Progress Review is a specific kind of coaching discussion, tied to the employee's Annual Objectives and Standards. It is an informal discussion in which the manager coaches the direct report to meet any unmet goals that are below target, and praises him or her for goals that are being met. Conducting progress reviews are a very important role for being an effective leader or coach. It is suggested that each of your direct reports receive a progress review discussion from you at least 2-3 times per year. Keeping Your Anger Under Control In my work with individuals and couples, I see many people who have a difficult time expressing and managing angry feelings. Let's take a look at what causes people to become angry and how they can respond to stressful situations more productively. Coaching May Be For You Are you looking for someone who will hold you accountable to achieving your goals? Career coaching and mentoring may be what you need to accomplish what you really want in your career. Your friends and family certainly love you and want the best for you, but they can't always make the time to devote the necessary hours you may need to achieve your objectives and goals. Your friends and family have objectives and goals that they are looking to achieve as well. 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