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Make Progress Now: Take the Hand Brakes Off Your Life!
Do you find yourself striving upward in life yet making little or no progress? Are you high on activity but low on achievement? Very clearly, it's time to stop, look and listen. You're obviously not doing something right. I'll share with you something that happened to me recently. I believe it will help you understand my point. I am an "Advanced Learner" driver. By now I shouldn't still be wearing my learner plates, I guess I just love the fact that people clear out of the way when I'm coming, and clamour to help me at the slightest sign of driver-distress. Talk about loving thy neighbour! Any way, I was driving up a steep hill one bright Sunday morning when I noticed the car making some not-so-funny growling noises. Also, to my alarm, no matter how hard I stepped on the throttle, the car would not accelerate. It continued its belaboured, uphill climb, growling grudgingly as it went. I made it some how to the top of the hill and pulled over to see what all the fuss was about. As the smell of burning rubber reached my nose, my teenage son, sitting next to me exclaimed, "Mom, the hand brakes are on!" I had been striving upward, making very little progress. I was "high on activity, but low on achievement." Thank God it occurred to me to "stop, look and listen." I had the hand brakes on the whole time; the trouble was entirely my fault! The strange part was that it took some one else to spot the problem. It could have taken me ages, and much further damage, to see it myself. Albert Einstein is reported to have said, "You can't solve a problem with the same mind that created it." Quite often in life we have the hand brakes on and don't even know it. When a little effort doesn't give us the results we desire, we apply more of the same effort. We know something is wrong, we can even smell burning rubber. But sadly, many of us just keep on "screeching on," not taking time out for a re-think, and not asking anyone else for help. The point I'm making is that when we apply ourselves as best we know how, and still do not get the results we desire, it should be obvious that "the best we know how" just isn't good enough. We need to stop, look and listen. We might need outside help. Any further activity could cause even more damage. These hand brakes quite often take the form of self-limiting beliefs. We usually don't know we have them. But if we take the time out, with a trusted friend or coach, our words, actions, inactions and assumptions will quite likely reveal their existence. A case in point: I have a friend who was not getting enough business contracts. She was qualified, capable and her prospects often gave her audience. She presented her business well and had a sound, desirable service to offer. But somehow, prospect-conversion rate remained low. We talked, and after a while her problem became evident. I could tell that she had self-doubt. Because hers was a young, small business she felt intimidated by the older giants. She felt she wasn't as experienced and did not have impressive client lists like they did. As a result, she approached mainly small business owners, who, though impressed, could not afford her fees. Occasionally she serviced larger clients, but that was when "a friend of a friend" gave her a referral. When made aware of these limiting beliefs she admitted, though surprised, that it was true. It was as if scales had suddenly fallen off her eyes. She had no idea that she had self-doubt. She had re-examined her services, her presentation and everything else she could think of, to no avail. In the end, I sent her off to a business consultant who helped her repackage her offerings and drew up a new marketing plan for her. I took her through a series of coaching sessions to build self-belief and handle procrastination. Today my friend has a sizeable, paying client base, and has learnt to stop often to look and listen when things don�t go as planned. She has also learnt to seek help. Dear reader, is yours a case of struggle without success? Have you taken time out to examine your case? Remember, it isn't likely that you will spot the problem yourself. It's probably your thinking that created it in the first place. A trip to a consultant or coach might be just what you need. He/she is more likely to see that your hand brakes are on than you are. A coach is also better able to determine the nature of your hand brakes, as self-doubt is only one of them. And with a network of other consultants, a coach can recommend the help you need. Not being personally and emotionally involved, a coach's opinion will most likely be objective. He/she will not be critical of you but supportive. There is no reason why you should continue with high activity and low achievement. You owe it to yourself to stop, look and listen. People today avail themselves of coaching and consulting for a variety of problems: business strategy, weight-loss, image-making, school work, career management the list could go on. Wherever progress is slow, or results are undesirable, a coach could save the day. At the end of my ordeal with the hand brakes, my mechanic presented me with a hair-raising bill. I had burned my clutch plates, but thankfully they could be replaced. Repairing the damage done to our lives or businesses might not be that easy. We might never even get the chance. Before the damage is extensive, stop, look and listen. You just might need a coach to help you. Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja Oma Edoja is a published writer, motivational speaker and infopreneur. She speaks to, and works with people seeking more out of life. She would love to answer questions on self-limiting beliefs. Visit her blog http://omaslounge.blogspot.com (for inspiration and motivation). Contact her (via blog) for a free assessment of your coaching needs.
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Business Management Coaching for Results He's a very successful sales manger who craves results. He can't be bothered with people who don't produce. They are losers. He always produces the numbers year after year. The question is does he do it through bullying or coaching? Building a Strong Coaching Practice As a person who has been around the coaching profession for a number of years, I wish I could say that my practice is full right now. But the fact is that I've been pursuing TV gigs in the last few years and haven't put much emphasis on building my individual coaching practice. I've also been blessed to receive several corporate coaching and training jobs so the individual coaching has taken a back seat. Why Therapy Fails Sometimes I saw a couple for marriage counseling this week, and when I asked them if they had ever seen anyone else for counseling they said they had worked with two other therapists. They had seen one therapist on and off a few years back. They had seen the other one only a few times. They could not even remember her name. Words That Inspire - PEACE WORDS THAT INSPIRE One BIG Way To Increase Your Values and Self-Esteem One hour here, two hours there, even fifteen minutes, it all adds up, and quickly too. Television is toxic to our self- esteem. In fact, 90% of television programs are a depressant. That leaves only 10% as a stimulant. With such a high percentage of negativity fueling the majority of this country television must play into the fact that anti- depressant consumption is doubling by the year. So, if you are wondering why you have low self-esteem, think about your television habits. Coaches, Do You Make These 7 Deadly Cash Flow Mistakes in Your Practice? Managing cash flow is every small business owner's most important function. Avoid these seven deadly mistakes to make sure you aren't creating cash flow problems in your coaching practice. We Are Exactly Where We Choose to Be The idea for this month's newsletter came from an unlikely encounter: I recently had lunch with a new friend named Rick Rockwell. You may remember him as the bachelor from the first-ever reality TV show, "Who Wants to Marry a Multimillionaire?" Beware of Psychic Vampires I am often asked how I stay happy and motivated all the time. The answer has two parts to it; positivity and self-talk. Key Questions for a Coaching Conversation There are 2 key skills that coaches need to be truly effective, the ability to listen (often for what is missing rather than what is said) and the ability to ask the right question at the right time. Are You Too Critical? First of all, criticalness breaks up more relationships, than anything else. And that criticalness is usually over the children or money! You Can Get There From Here But first you've got to raise your standards. Loving Every Phenomenal Part of You Have you ever wished yourself away? I am not referring to leaving your precious life on this Earth; but rather, just wished you weren't a certain way or did not have some particular qualities and mannerisms that were so apparent to you. I know I have. 3 Easy Steps to Low Stress Communication Life is all about choices. And so is the way you communicate. You can fill your days with frustrating high stress communication or you can have days of low stress effective communication with your peers. How to Make $100,000 Dollars as a Personal Trainer Part A for Attitude! My name is Greg Ryan. For the last twenty years I have counseled thousands of personal trainers, fitness directors and gym owners on how be successful in the health and fitness industry. No matter where I go in the world, no matter the size of the gym the biggest reason for their lack of success is all the same. My question is, "Do you want to be a mediocre Personal Trainer or do you want to be a GREAT one? How to Adopt a Losing Attitude We have all heard the expression, "Where your heart is?, your treasure will be also." Allow me to modify this tried and true wisdom, to create an equally valid point: "Where your thoughts are, your hips will be also." What do I mean by this? Try this experiment: Take a few seconds to write the first the five words that pop into your head in response to this question: How do I describe myself? Business Career Executive Coaching Article -Motivator, Discipline and Desire "There is a certain combination of desire and discipline in the way I work. Discipline by itself simply is not enough in the creative process." - Robert De Niro Do You Dither in Your Job Search? I looked up the definition of "to dither" before writing this article. It is to be agitated and in a nervous state. Leadership Coaching at Gettysburg The battle at Gettysburg is one of the most notable events in U.S. History. It is a battle where more lives were taken than in any other battle in North America. In this small farming community in 1863, George Meade's Union Army comprising of 90,000 troops met Robert Lee's Confederate Army of 75,000. We can read volumes of literature and accounts of heroes, leaders, front-line soldiers and others directly and indirectly impacted by the event. Certainly there are incredible leadership coaching and other lessons from the lives of these men and women and the strategic events which became the critical turning point in the Civil War. God, Grant Me Patience.....And, I Want It Now!! Are you facing a difficult time in your life? Do you feel like a fish out of water? If today was a fish, would you want to throw it back in the river? If this is your situation, make no negative destructive decisions. Be Patient. Know that time can perform many miracles. Why Bosses Dont Get All the News Not long ago, a friend who works in television complained that the industry has no interest in real business stories. And, I had to agree with him, since we don't see much coverage that doesn't involve stock prices or some sort of scandal.
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